


a little bit every day

by yadoiangel



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Confessions, M/M, Oblivious Shirabu Kenjirou, Pining Semi Eita, Short & Sweet, Stargazing, on a hiking trip, this is so cliché i don't know what to tell you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:07:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27264721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yadoiangel/pseuds/yadoiangel
Summary: “If that’s what you want,” Semi smiled at him full-on before moving to go back under his layers.“It is,” Shirabu answered, then he reached out a hand.Semi only stared at it, then up at the younger boy before touching him with just a fingertip.It was like the world exploded around them then.for SemiShira Week, Day 5prompts: Soulmates AU, Stargazing
Relationships: Semi Eita/Shirabu Kenjirou
Comments: 2
Kudos: 62
Collections: Semishira Week 2020





	a little bit every day

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TiassheReisha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TiassheReisha/gifts).



> Huge thank you for Meg for making me write SemiShira even if I didn't have any plans to. This one's for you, and I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did writing it!

_Hindsight was a powerful thing,_ Shirabu thought to himself, lying down and staring up at the night sky surrounded by his senpais and kouhais. They were on a hiking trip before the third years graduated, requested by Ushijima-san himself.

_I should have known._

When he chose to go to Shiratorizawa, the concept of soulmates—or fated people—was still somewhat a mystery to him then. All he knew was that seeing Ushijima-san on the court inspired a blaze in him that he thought was so similar to the moment when one person would realize they were one of the lucky ones to have a match—or so everyone told him—that he wanted to follow the star player no matter where he went.

The thing was, figuring out if they were actually fated was so tricky to tell. To most people, _soulmates_ or _fate_ was just a concept from a fairytale, but to a select few, it was a very real situation. At one point it was such a hot topic that actual research was done about it.

The findings were this:

  * Prior to their first meeting, fated people would feel heat the closer they were to their ‘soulmate’. This sensation would start roughly around 10-13 years old, and it was an internal heat that only they could feel;
  * When they first meet, they would feel the heat intensify—not to the point of burning, but enough to be uncomfortable. The only way to assuage it is to touch their fated partner—or partners, as the case may be;
  * When they first touch, the heat would spread out to surround them, moving outward from the point of contact. After that, their heat would be an external force—a manifestation of their connection, and it starts to ebb and flow depending on the strength of their relationship, just like how it was when the heat would lead them towards their fated partner.
  * Roughly about 2% of the population experiences this phenomenon, garnering attention whenever a fated match pops up—the most common were pairs, but trios and more people being fated has been seen as well, as best as history could show.



It was tricky because what he felt around Ushijima-san wasn’t always heat, so to his analytical mind it didn’t fit the scientific process, no matter how many times his parents—who were fated—assured him it was different for every person.

And for people who were fated, his parents were big on the choice aspect of soulmates.

“Just remember, Kenjiro. Even if you’re fated, it doesn’t mean you have to fall in love, or even stay in contact with the people you’re fated with,” his mother would always tell him whenever he’d ask about their connection when he was little, so sure that her son would be fated, too.

“You get your stubbornness from your mother, you know. She was so against the idea of fate deciding for her that she almost never gave me a chance,” his father would then add, bumping his shoulder against his mother’s affectionately.

“What happened then? That you two ended up together?” Shirabu had asked, once. He was maybe about 7 or 8 years old, already stubborn like his father called him, already blunt.

“Typically what happens with other, non-fated people who fall in love and end up together,” his mother answered, and from her tone it was an open and shut discussion, simple as that.

~~~

It didn’t feel as simple as that now, feeling the warmth that had always been bubbling just under his skin transform into a boil, feeling it literally move across his body to concentrate on the outer side of his left arm—where Semi-san was sleeping.

See, this was another thing that made soulmate-finding tricky—the heat wasn’t always accurate. No research covered this uncertainty, and his parents didn’t talk much about before they met—which is why it never crossed his mind before now—but sometimes the warmth fluctuates so wildly that sometimes it gets confusing for one person.

Which is what happened to Shirabu, he now realized.

All this time, he thought it was supposed to be Ushijima-san, and because of that he worked so hard to be a starter on the team.

 _How tunnel-visioned of me,_ Shirabu mourned, _all that work for nothing._

A sound broke him from his despairing—this frustrated groan that he rarely heard but still recognized as Semi—coming from next to him and the younger boy startled, removing all his chances of pretending he was asleep to avoid the coming conversation.

“I’m sorry, Shirabu. I didn’t mean to wake you,” came his senior’s voice then, and Shirabu felt so tense, stilling so completely that he might as well be one of the frozen rocks staring up at the stars like the ones they saw earlier while they were hiking up to this spot.

“I-It’s okay, Semi-san. I wasn’t sleeping, anyway,” Shirabu answered quietly, still the dutiful kouhai even if he dreaded the conversation that he was sure was coming.

“Oh? Something on your mind?” the older boy asked, and Shirabu could feel him shift in his sleeping bag, likely turning to face the blonde.

“It’s nothing! Just thinking about the team now that you guys are gone,” Shirabu answered quickly, wanting to steer the conversation away from the present—defaulting to volleyball, as always. Volleyball was nice, and it was safe for teammates to talk about it, too—impersonal and light.

“I’m sure things will be alright, though. Wakatoshi-kun is confident in your leading abilities, and us third years agree with his decision. You can handle coach Washijou too, when he gets too much on the first years. The only thing you need to worry about is how we’re gonna get Wakatoshi-kun down from this mountain tomorrow,” Semi chuckled, and Shirabu was taken aback.

He was…touched by his senpai’s confidence in him; it felt different from the confidence that Ushijima showed when he passed on the captaincy. Ushijima was a rock, and his belief was absolute that it left no room for Shirabu’s doubts and insecurities; it was suffocating, to say the least, being expected of delivering nothing less than perfect. With Semi, for the first time Shirabu felt like it was okay to make mistakes. The blonde felt comfort and—for lack of a better word—warmth to be reassured that they would still be okay even if things wouldn’t go their way.

“T-thank you, Semi-senpai,” Shirabu said, unconsciously turning his head to face the older boy.

It seemed like Semi didn’t expect it either, and before he could go back to normal, Shirabu saw the soft eyes, the small, bittersweet smile, and the hand that was almost touching his sleeping bag.

“There’s nothing to thank, Shirabu. Goodnight,” Semi told him with an embarrassed smile before turning his back on the younger boy.

With his perception no longer clouded, Shirabu finally realized what was in front of his eyes the whole time.

“You know,” he said out loud in a deceptively calm, sure voice, and now it was his turn to watch as his senpai froze up.

Semi’s shoulders infinitesimally crept up to his ears, the sleeping bag over his legs rustling that made Shirabu think the older boy’s legs was also curling up, almost in a fetal position. It would have been hilarious if not for the circumstances of the pose.

“How long?” Shirabu followed up, not knowing how to feel.

“Ever since your introduction last year,” Semi eventually answered, knowing the blonde wouldn’t stop until he was satisfied.

“And you didn’t think to say anything?!” Shirabu exploded, his mind going back to that time. _Two years wasted,_ his mind supplied.

“Keep your voice down, Shirabu. Do you want to wake up the whole team?” Semi scolded gently, sighing and turning to lie on his back again. He covered an arm over his eyes and spoke up. “I could tell you didn’t know, so I didn’t want to force anything in case you didn’t _want_ to know.”

“Why would you think I wouldn’t want to know?!” Shirabu scoffed, whispering the scream that he oh so wanted to let out. It was so hot now, the left part of his body burning up that decided to kick away all the layers he had.

“What, you just expect your soulmate to go up to you and say ‘Hi! I’m your soulmate, let’s fall in love now?’” Semi scoffed back, only eyeing the younger boy as he struggled with the sleeping bag. He, on the other hand, was used to the burn.

“Who said anything about love?” Shirabu asked sharply, finally succeeding in freeing himself and extending his feet towards the older boy so that the heat focused on the soles.

“Exactly. Why would you need to know that we’re fated if you’re not going to do anything about it? Telling you then would only make things awkward, especially since you have a thing for Wakatoshi-kun,” Semi said airily.

“W-What? How do you know _that?_ ” Shirabu spluttered, looking around the camp to check if everyone was indeed asleep.

“How could I not? You were so loud about it, Shirabu,” Semi laughed, but it held the same bittersweet tone that his smile from before did.

“Semi-senpai…” Shirabu trailed off, not knowing what to say in light of another epiphany.

In that split-second when Semi was looking at him unguarded, Shirabu saw the same expression his father always had whenever he talked about the beginning of his relationship with the setter’s mother.

“Ah, it was inevitable. You _are_ a setter, so I guess it was only a matter of time before you realized,” Semi chuckled to himself, and it was almost a pitiful thing if not for the fact that Shirabu felt like he did something wrong.

“I don’t get it. Why wouldn’t you tell me? Especially since…” Shirabu didn’t know how to finish the sentence, and Semi sighed again.

“Especially since I was fated to you?” Semi asked, looking at the younger boy straight on for the first time, his face once again open to let Shirabu see everything he was feeling—all the love, all the frustration and despair that he bottled up in those two years.

Shirabu could only nod now, his throat closing up with the guilt he felt facing the enormity of Semi’s emotions.

“My mother is fated,” Semi told him, cutting through the haze that was about to come over him.

“Huh?” Shirabu asked intelligently.

“My mother is fated, like us,” Semi eyed him out of the corner of his eye, trying to see if the younger boy can handle another shock. “My father isn’t. My mother cut all ties with her _soulmate,_ ” the taller boy added, saying soulmate with so much derision it surprised the shorter boy.

“Oh,” was all Shirabu could say, mind going into overdrive over _that_ particular situation.

Fated people almost always ended up together, if not romantically then at least platonically. In the rare case of death, a fated person would lose all warmth in their bodies to such an extreme that the shock would end them in the hospital; voluntarily choosing to be separated from a living fated partner was unimaginable.

“How does she manage it?” Shirabu whispered, shuddering at the prospect of the cold.

“She just does,” Semi shrugged, “And this is why,” Semi added, his voice hard as he eyed the other out of the corner of his eye.

“Why what?” Shirabu was still struggling to rearrange his view of the world, his mind slow on the catch up to the conversation now.

“Why I didn’t want to tell you. Now you’re sitting there all panicked because you feel guilty,” Semi elaborated with a roll of his eyes, and Shirabu couldn’t even deny it.

“I’m sorry,” he said instead, feeling small.

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for! That’s what I’m trying to say. Just because you’re my soulmate doesn’t mean you have any obligations to me,” Semi told him, huffing and sitting up as well. “Besides, I thought it would be better if I let you be, pursuing Wakatoshi-kun. What would you have done if I interrupted?”

“I… don’t know. Ushijima-san obviously doesn’t feel the same way, so I think it’s best if I should just stop now,” Shirabu had been looking dazed, but with the decision a little color came back to his face.

“Ah, well. That’s how it is for unfated people too, so…” Semi let the sentence hang, eyeing his kouhai with a critical eye.

He didn’t think Shirabu made the decision just because of the news that he was his soulmate, so Semi was content with that. He went to lie back again, but he was caught off-guard by Shirabu’s sudden earnest voice.

“But what about you?” the blonde asked.

“What about me?” Semi shot back, confused.

“You’re…” Shirabu still couldn’t say it, gesturing vaguely at the older boy with his hands in the hope that Semi would understand.

“You don’t have to do anything for me, Shirabu. This is my problem I have to deal with,” Semi’s eyes softened again, a small smile showing on his face.

 _He’s pretty,_ Shirabu’s mind supplied for him.

“I want to,” Shirabu blurted out, blushing immediately after.

“You want to… what, exactly?” Semi raised an eyebrow at him, hope flaring in him like a new heat that he tried to squash down.

“I want to… know you, for starters. I’ve only ever focused on Ushijima-san, and now I realize how short-sighted that was of me,” Shirabu rambled, looking so earnest it made Semi’s heart ache something fierce, and the older boy laughed out loud.

“Semi-senpai?” Shirabu asked when he was done.

“If that’s what you want,” Semi smiled at him full-on before moving to go back under his layers.

“It is,” Shirabu answered, then he reached out a hand.

Semi only stared at it, then up at the younger boy before touching him with just a fingertip.

It was like the world exploded around them then. From that single point of contact it was like the heat was sucked out of them both, but it didn’t leave them feeling cold, no. The explosion surrounded the two of them, like how Shirabu always imagined, but it was so much more than what he could think up. It was a quiet kind of explosion, one where he felt warmth like that of his parent’s love, it felt like security, it felt like one other thing he can’t quite recognize.

“I think… This is something I can love, Semi-san. A little bit every day,” Shirabu told him, and he was serious about it too.

“Ahh… hope, how wonderful to feel it again,” Semi sighed contentedly, now covering Shirabu’s entire hand with his.

It was such a ridiculous, out of character, Shakespearian thing to say that Shirabu burst out in giggles with Semi following right after. The two of them fell into each other instead of their sleeping bags with the giddiness of it all, their warmth permeating all over them, beating and alive and _hopeful,_ right there under the stars.

**Author's Note:**

> Scream at me on my [twitter!](https://twitter.com/yadoiAnghel) ~~I crave your validation~~ lmao


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